photo of Debbie AugenthalerDebbie Augenthaler, LMHC, NCC

Debbie is a psychotherapist in private practice in New York City. Her husband, Jim, died suddenly in her arms when she was only 36 years old. He had been healthy and vibrant – the doctors compared the probability of his death by heart attack to being struck by lightning. That lightning strike ended her life as she knew it and thus began the “baptism by fire” that brought her to her new future.

Debbie’s award-winning book, You Are Not Alone, is the book she wishes she’d had when she was grieving, and is glad to have now to offer clients experiencing life-altering losses. With the connection of a shared experience, Debbie guides the reader through grief to transformation and a new beginning. You Are Not Alone is the 2018 Winner of the Foreword INDIES 2018 Book Awards, Grief/Grieving, and an Award Finalist in Health: Psychology/Mental Health for the 2019 International Book Awards.

As a psychotherapist specializing in trauma, grief, and loss, Debbie’s clinical training is steeped in Western traditions of healing. Interweaving the knowledge gained from her graduate studies, clinical training, working with many clients, and her life experiences has made her very curious and interested in how people have been dealing with grief and loss since the beginning of time. She has been on a wonderful journey of studying Eastern philosophy, energy healing, and exploring spiritual practices from cultures around the world, learning about the wisdom of the ages and the many different ways people have ritualized grief and healing. Ancient healing traditions incorporate the connection to that which is beyond our physical world, the connection to spirit, to earth, to all that is. To Love. She is building a bridge between the two traditions, using time-honored practices to inform her work with clients.

Debbie helps normalize common feelings and experiences for people who are grieving, and holds space for each of us to experience grief in our own way and time, because grief is not linear. There are many gifts that accompany loss, including spiritual awakenings, discovering the connection with forever love, developing deep compassion, and grateful appreciation for the blessings along the way from grief to healing to transformation and joy. Debbie has walked this path throughout her life and wants to help you on your path from grief to joy.

I believe we are all connected. No one should feel alone in their grief, their sorrow, their hope, their healing, their transformation.

Debbie has an MA in Counseling for Mental Health and Wellness from New York University. She completed a two year post graduate Advanced Trauma Studies program from the Institute of Contemporary Psychotherapy and is trained in various modalities that inform a holistically based practice including EMDR, Internal Family Systems, Sensorimotor Psychotherapy, Energy Psychology, and Hypnosis.

In 2012 she received the NYU Steinhardt Award for Outstanding Clinical Service.

Debbie speaks regularly in the New York area, and is available to give workshops, trainings and talks to professionals, grief support groups, and books groups around the country. To book Debbie, please visit her Workshops & Talks page.

She has also been featured in numerous interviews, articles, and podcasts. Visit her Press Page to learn more.

I know Jim still lives on in spirit and in me. Sin I know Jim still lives on in spirit and in me. Since his soul flew out the window in the early morning light, he’s been with me always in my heart. Being seen by him, his nurturance, his love, his humor, lit a spark in the part of me afraid to love yet yearning for it. He taught me to trust in love, trust in him, and trust in myself. I am deeply grateful for the time we had together—it is the biggest gift of my life.⁠
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Loving him, losing him, grieving him—the entire experience of us expanded my heart and my life in so many ways. Taking me to places and to doing things I would never have imagined or dreamed of as a young girl. Giving me the gift of being able to be with others in their grief, with deep compassion, with heart connection, holding space and holding gazes of eyes glazed with grief and locked with shock. It is a privilege and an honor to share this space.⁠
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My heart is still expanding, allowing me to leave pieces of him and our love in the hearts of others. Leading me to hold my head up, open up my arms and my heart, embrace the world, embrace this life, this day, this hour, this moment, this.�⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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An excerpt from the book 'You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope' by Debbie Augenthaler. ⁠
LINK is in our profile. ⁠
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#giftsofloss #griefandhealing #griefandloss #gratitude #gratitudeandhealing #maryelizabethfrye #youarenotalonebook #debbieaugenthalerauthor #grieving #compassion #heart #learning #expanding
It's one day a time, one step at a time. There is It's one day a time, one step at a time. There is no right or wrong way. Sometimes we feel like we are moving backwards. Or like we are stuck. Other days, the sun is out. ⁠
If you are grieving, know that you do not have to do this alone. I highly recommend finding a therapist who can help you through this difficult time. Mine was invaluable to me. ⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler
We all have changes, transitions, and transformati We all have changes, transitions, and transformation in our lives. Endings and beginnings are a lifelong journey and process. We all have times of sorrow, sadness, hope, joy and growth, shedding old ways and growing into new ways of being.⁠
Loss of any kind can bring great gifts, to yourself and to others. There is no way for us to know this at the beginning of grief. If someone had told me this in the first few months after Jim died, I might have slapped them and said, “How can you say that? How, in any way, can this ever be seen as a gift?” It takes time, and it certainly doesn’t mean the loss is the gift.  It’s what comes after the loss. It’s what we learn in the process of grieving, who we become afterwards. ⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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An excerpt from the book 'You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope' by Debbie Augenthaler. ⁠
LINK is in our profile. ⁠
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#giftsofloss #griefandhealing #griefandloss #onedayatatime #onestepatatime #sheddingoldways #growth #loss #griefprocess #becoming #belonging #onestep #youarenotalonebook
Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious Love is patient; love is kind; love is not envious or boastful or arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful; it does not rejoice in wrongdoing, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.⁠
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Love never ends. But as for prophecies, they will come to an end; as for tongues, they will cease; as for knowledge, it will come to an end. For we know only in part, and we prophesy only in part; but when the complete comes, the partial will come to an end. When I was a child, I spoke like a child, I thought like a child, I reasoned like a child; when I became an adult, I put an end to childish ways. For now we see in a mirror, dimly, but then we will see face to face. Now I know only in part; then I will know fully, even as I have been fully known. ⁠
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And now faith, hope, and love abide, these three; and the greatest of these is love.⁠
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1 Corinthians 13:4-13⁠
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Grief has no timetable. Some people struggle with Grief has no timetable. Some people struggle with feelings of guilt and some don’t. Don’t let the “shoulds” decide for you. Do what feels right for you.⁠
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When you have an episode of overwhelming grief even years later, just know this is natural. As we know, grief is not linear; even years later you might feel like you’ve gone back to what it felt like in the beginning. ⁠
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Having my therapist to help me navigate the ups and downs and what felt like going backwards was crucial to my healing. You don’t have to do it alone—if it’s an option, find a qualified professional. If not, ask someone you trust who can help by listening and supporting you.�⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler #therapy #therapyworks
We have all heard people say, “If THAT terrible We have all heard people say, “If THAT terrible event hadn’t happened, then I wouldn’t have had the chance for THIS meaningful opportunity." Everything from starting charities, to parents who have lost children and gone to Washington to change legislation, to volunteering to help those in need, and so much more. Foundations have been started, books have been written, new love has formed. So much good coming out of so much pain. All of it shapes who we become. ⁠
If I had not gone through the losses I did, I wouldn’t be who I am today.⁠
If your loss one day will enable you to reach another and touch even ONE other person in a positive way in their time of need—loving them, supporting and encouraging them—whom might they help in return? One simple gesture of kindness and compassion can start a wave of healing light that ripples out and affects countless others.⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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An excerpt from the book 'You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope' by Debbie Augenthaler. ⁠
LINK is in our profile. ⁠
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#giftsofloss #griefandhealing #griefandloss #gratitude  #healing
Rumi said it best. ⁠ 'Love is the whole thing. W Rumi said it best. ⁠
'Love is the whole thing. We are only pieces.'⁠
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#rumi #grieftogratitude #youarenotalone
If someone you know is grieving, acknowledging the If someone you know is grieving, acknowledging the loss is what’s important. This is kind and supportive.	⁠
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A gentle clasp of the hand, a hug, sharing a kind thought like, ⁠
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“I think of him often and miss him” ⁠
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is welcomed. Or, ⁠
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“You and your family are in my prayers.” ⁠
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We want our loved ones to be remembered and missed and want to talk about the person we love, whose love is still alive, carried in our hearts. Whose energy is still all around us and always will be. We don’t want to be concerned we might cause others discomfort because we still talk about the person we love. All the time. We want to know it’s okay. Because it is! ⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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Purchase the book 'You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope' by Debbie Augenthaler. ⁠
LINK is in our profile. ⁠
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#remembering #jewishprayer #remember #griefandhealing #griefandloss #gratitude #loveliveson #loveisforever #rememberwhoyouare #itsokaytogrieve #debbieaugenthalerauthor #youarenotalonebook #grief #grieving #grieveinyourownway #griefsupport #griefshare #griefisajourney #griefisaprocess #griefprocess #griefcounseling #therapy #therapyworks #healing
I’m grateful for my angels here on earth and on I’m grateful for my angels here on earth and on the other side. For those who have helped me to find the path when all seemed lost. ⁠
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Someone’s kindness or what may seem like a small gesture on their part can change the course of a life. You can be an angel to someone without even knowing it. Often, when we’ve been through a life-altering loss, the compassion and empathy we gain translates into wanting to do something meaningful for others—a gift.⁠
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Look for the angels in your life. Call on them when you need them. Let your tribe embrace you and show you the way. Often, great strength can be found in the stories of previous generations—what they had to overcome so that you can be here today. Is there someone in your family who can share stories of how they’ve overcome tragedy?⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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Purchase the book 'You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope' by Debbie Augenthaler. ⁠
LINK is in our profile. ⁠
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#angels #angeltribe #cherylstrayed #findthepath #followthepath #griefandhealing #griefandloss #gratitude #loveliveson #loveisforever #rememberwhoyouare #itsokaytogrieve #debbieaugenthalerauthor #youarenotalonebook #grief #grieving #grieveinyourownway #griefsupport #griefshare #griefisajourney #griefisaprocess #griefprocess #griefcounseling #therapy #therapyworks #healing
“Twice Blessed”⁠ by David Whyte⁠ ⁠ So th “Twice Blessed”⁠
by David Whyte⁠
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So that I stopped⁠
there⁠
and looked⁠
into the waters⁠
seeing not only⁠
my reflected face⁠
but the great sky⁠
that framed⁠
my lonely figure⁠
and after a moment⁠
I lifted my hands⁠
and then my eyes⁠
and I allowed myself⁠
to be astonished⁠
by the great⁠
everywhere⁠
calling to me⁠
like an old⁠
and unspoken⁠
invitation,⁠
made new⁠
by the sun⁠
and the spring,⁠
and the cloud⁠
and the light,⁠
like something⁠
both⁠
calling to me⁠
and radiating⁠
from where I stood,⁠
as if I could⁠
understand⁠
everything⁠
I had been given⁠
and everything ever⁠
taken from me,⁠
as if I could be⁠
everything I have ever⁠
learned⁠
and everything⁠
I could ever know,⁠
as if I knew⁠
both the way I had come⁠
and, secretly,⁠
the way⁠
underneath⁠
I was still⁠
promised to go,⁠
brought together,⁠
like this, with the⁠
unyielding ground⁠
and the symmetry⁠
of the moving sky,⁠
caught in still waters.⁠
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Someone I have been,⁠
and someone⁠
I am just,⁠
about to become,⁠
something I am⁠
and will be forever,⁠
the sheer generosity⁠
of being loved⁠
through loving:⁠
the miracle reflection⁠
of a twice blessed life.⁠
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#davidwhyte #grieftogratitude #youarenotalone ⁠
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Most importantly, be kind to yourself. It's what y Most importantly, be kind to yourself. It's what you need right now.⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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#kind #kindness #dalailama #bekind #bekindtoyourself #griefandhealing #griefandloss #gratitude #itsokaytogrieve #debbieaugenthalerauthor #youarenotalonebook #grief #grieving #grieveinyourownway #griefsupport #griefshare #griefisajourney #griefisaprocess #griefprocess #griefcounseling #therapy #therapyworks #healing
Love lives on in your heart, it does not die. ⁠ Love lives on in your heart, it does not die. ⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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#griefandhealing #griefandloss #gratitude #love #loveandloss #griefquotes #loveliveson #loveisforever #rememberwhoyouare #itsokaytogrieve #debbieaugenthalerauthor #youarenotalonebook #grief #grieving #grieveinyourownway #griefsupport #griefshare
When the shock and numbness begins to wear off, re When the shock and numbness begins to wear off, reality starts to sink in around the edges. When it happens is different for everyone. Sometimes it’s a few weeks, sometimes it’s a few months. There is no timetable. ⁠
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Almost everyone experiences anxiety. There are many ways we try to alleviate it. For me, it was walking. What is it for you? It could be binge watching Netflix or drinking too much or eating too much or sleeping too much or cleaning the house over and over or keeping yourself so busy you don’t have to time to think. That’s the whole point—it’s hard to be in the new world of After.⁠
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Do you sometimes feel like you can’t stand to be in your skin? If this is your experience, know this: you are not the only one. You’re not going crazy. ⁠
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Remember, grief is not linear. You will go back and forth between all the phases of anger and denial and bargaining and depression and acceptance. Sometimes in one day. Sometimes in one hour. So as you stumble and stride and stop to gather strength along the way towards healing, be compassionate toward yourself.⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler⁠
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An excerpt from the book 'You Are Not Alone: A Heartfelt Guide to Grief, Healing, and Hope' by Debbie Augenthaler. ⁠
LINK is in our profile. ⁠
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#griefisnotlinear #griefandhealing #griefandloss #itsokaytogrieve #debbieaugenthalerauthor #youarenotalonebook #grief #grieving #grieveinyourownway #griefsupport #griefshare #griefisajourney #griefisaprocess #griefprocess #griefcounseling #therapy #therapyworks #healing
If you are in a dark place, I urge you, with all m If you are in a dark place, I urge you, with all my heart, to find someone who can help you. I wholeheartedly believe in therapy; it was crucial to my healing. I became a therapist because I wanted to help others like my therapist helped me. ⁠
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If therapy is not an option for you, I urge you to reach out to someone who will help you through this dark period. Find someone you can trust, who will hold you when you are in such pain. If you go to a place of worship, reach out to your pastor, your priest, your rabbi. Find a support group, call a hotline, your best friend, a family member—call someone you know can hold you through this time. ⁠
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I urge you, if you’re in this place, just hold on, breathe through it, cry through it, for these moments pass, and you WILL get through it.	⁠
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#grieftogratitude #youarenotalone #debbieaugenthaler

“Your heart and my heart are very, very old friends”

— Hafiz

If you are in need of support, please CLICK HERE for a list of resources.

Crisis Resources

Emergency: 911

These numbers are provided for informational purposes only and may be subject to change.
All numbers are valid for the United States.

To find a qualified therapist, go to Psychology Today’s website, and follow the simple steps to find a therapist in your area. Here’s the link: https://www.psychologytoday.com/us    This is a world-wide resource. If you’re not in the US, go to the upper right hand corner of the page and change the country.

  • National Suicide Prevention Lifeline:

1 (800) 273-8255

  • National Domestic Violence Hotline:

1 (800) 799-7233

  • Family Violence Helpline:

1 (800) 966-6228

  • National Hopeline Network:

1 (800) 784-2433

  • Self-Harm Hotline:

1 (800) 366-8288

  • Planned Parenthood Hotline:

1 (800) 230-7526

  • American Association of Poison Control Centers:

1 (800) 222-1222

  • Alcoholism & Drug Dependency Hope Line:

1 (800) 622-2255

  • National Crisis Line, Anorexia and Bulimia:

1 (800) 233-4357

  • GLBT Hotline:

1 (888) 843-4564

  • TREVOR Crisis Hotline:

1 (866) 488-7386

  • AIDS Crisis Line:

1 (800) 221-7044

  • Lifeline Crisis Chat:

(Online live messaging): http://www.crisischat.org/

  • Crisis Text Line:

Text “START” TO 741-741

  • Veterans Crisis

Live chat https://www.veteranscrisisline.net/,
Call 1-800-273-8255 (press 1)
Text 838-255

*This page and my website are not a substitute for psychotherapy or other forms of professional support.

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